Making the right decision can be a very powerful and life-changing thing to do – a topic I’ve just written about in my blog www.maxineharley.com – but what if you find it difficult to make decisions?
Perhaps you don’t really know yourself well enough to know what would be best for you; maybe you’ve relied on other people telling or directing you to do what they consider is best; maybe you allow your inner head-heckling voice to distract you, or to send you off on a tangent, or to criticise you for your vagueness and indecisiveness. It might be that your upbringing has created blocks to your being in touch with what you want or need, let alone being able to get them.
If so, you have to make a decision to learn how to make good decisions!
Otherwise your decisions might be based upon peer pressure, people-pleasing, emotional hurt and reactivity, or perhaps ‘fate and destiny’ thinking…or avoidance of making decisions altogether and having a passive acceptance of the way things already are.
The act of making a good decision entails some relevant questions of yourself:
How am I ‘feeling in my gut’ about this?
How will my decision benefit my life or the lives of others?
Am I firmly committed to it?
What do I intend the consequences of my decision to be?
When will I take definite action?
We know from the study of Quantum Physics that a wave of energy becomes a particle when it is observed and focussed upon. This holds true with your thoughts too – which are a form of energy. Success (whatever that means to you) comes from your belief in something being right for you, then making a firm decision, and finally in taking the necessary action to bring it about.
It becomes easier as you become aware of what has been preventing you from making good robust decisions in the past, and now making that first decision to do things differently, in spite of your initial discomfort perhaps.
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.” Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe.
The two modules (8-week/16 hour groups) of TREP called ‘Understanding Yourself’ and ‘How To Be More Confident’ will both help you to become better acquainted with yourself, and you will also learn how to generate the confidence to make the choices and decisions that best serve you in the longer-term.
By Maxine Harley www.the-ripple-effect.co.uk www.maxineharley.com www.qpp.uk.com
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